tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9051656570241132451.post2588802353138418965..comments2019-02-05T10:06:27.081-05:00Comments on Lusting WanderLuster: You just can't spare your dime, honey by Susan Ager, Detroit Free PressLustingWanderlusterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17445715142848748061noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9051656570241132451.post-60325631702355728822010-03-23T14:12:08.394-04:002010-03-23T14:12:08.394-04:00Gwenevere, thank you for the thoughtful comment.
...Gwenevere, thank you for the thoughtful comment. <br />Having compassion is not a flaw and I don't think it is related to why women want to protect their abusers. I think it is much deeper than that. Women who are in abusive relationships have no self-esteem. Putting up with abuse because of low self-esteem is different than a person showing compassion for their abusers. <br />The whole point of Ms. Ager's article is to stress the importance of raising our daughters so that they have a high self-esteem and know that they can walk away from questionable circumstances and undesirable people. <br />As far as Becky's comment about life outside children, this is an area where each one of us decides for ourselves and we each have the right to feel good about our decision. But, as a mother of 3 daughters, I will say that I agree with the meaning of her statement that for a mother to have a passion of her own, whether it be baking, pottery, books, sailing, or whatever, sets a great example for her children - not just daughters, but sons as well. The more we show them that we are individuals with our own personal interests and not only 'wife,' and 'mother,' (notice I did not say 'just') the more we teach our children what self-respect looks like. And that is the best example and role model we can set.LustingWanderlusterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17445715142848748061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9051656570241132451.post-33768575798506339052010-03-23T13:35:35.177-04:002010-03-23T13:35:35.177-04:00My husband is the deputy prosecutor responsible fo...My husband is the deputy prosecutor responsible for trying domestic violence cases. At least once a week he comes home frustrated because he lost another case because the victim either lies on the stand to protect her batterer or won't testify at all.<br /><br />Why does this happen? Is it because women are weak or compassionate? I tell to try my husband that I think that many women have this flaw...even me, I don't care if the toys are picked up around the house every night but because I know he does, I make sure it gets done. Does that make me weak? Some will say yes, but I didn't get married or have kids to have my way all the time. I did it because I love someone. I'm lucky I had the good sense to find someone who wouldn't take advantage of my desire to please others.<br /><br />And to Becky...is it really a problem that some women have no passions outside their children? Just because you cannot fathom happiness in such a state doesn't mean it is impossible for others.Apron Appealhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05127409965304126490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9051656570241132451.post-82244436691608745982010-01-23T23:48:14.157-05:002010-01-23T23:48:14.157-05:00Thanks for the comment, Becky. Yes, it's very ...Thanks for the comment, Becky. Yes, it's very important to stress the fulfillment we get in pursuing personal passions. There is no substitute. It is what makes us feel vital.LustingWanderlusterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17445715142848748061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9051656570241132451.post-36301409379530129352010-01-23T12:58:54.477-05:002010-01-23T12:58:54.477-05:00Thanks for posting this column. It was very refres...Thanks for posting this column. It was very refreshing to read. I grew up in Madison, Wisconsin during the 70s (I went to grade school and high school with Richard!) in a very liberal environment. Both my parents were academics, and it was absolutely expected that I would have an interesting, fulfilling career. I planned to move to New York to work as an editor in book publishing. I remember when I told my mother that I needed to work on my typing speed so I could become an assistant first, she literally threw the pot she was holding across the room. "You will NOT be a secretary," she yelled. Yes, she could be a little over the top.<br /><br />But now I live in the suburbs of New Jersey, and I don't recognize a lot of the women. Nobody seems to want to talk about anything except their children. Is it our conservative times? Why do so few women have a passion of their own, outside of their children?Beckynoreply@blogger.com